Are the women of Vancouver too picky when it comes to finding a mate? According to survey results from an online dating site (www.ayi.com), Vancouver females are the least likely to respond to a man’s online message.
“Montreal and Ottawa came second and third in the survey by the New York-based dating site, while women from Calgary, Edmonton and Toronto emerged as the least picky.
The site came to its conclusions after looking at over 40,000 interactions between heterosexual men and women. It also ranked the country’s pickiest men, saying that Winnipeggers were least responsive and Torontonians most responsive to women’s online approaches, Canada.com reported.”
But don’t let the survey or Internet dating fail stories from friends deter you. This approach to dating can be thoroughly enjoyable as long as you don’t set expectations too high.
The truth of the matter is that Internet dating is a shot in the dark. One must be prepared for some disappointments. On the upside, your odds are about the same as meeting your ideal mate in a bar, and you don’t even have to put on a clean shirt.
The best part of Internet dating is that you get to practice your flirting skills. You also get first-hand experience with your potential date’s ability to string together sentences.
Other pros include:
- It’s immediate and convenient.
- You get the basic information about potential dates before meeting them in person
- You have access to thousands of people & can narrow your search using criteria
- Learn to speak and describe yourself kindly which reinforces a positive image
- You can be anyone you want to be — and so can everyone else
- Many Internet junkies aren’t interested in real relationships
- Wading through endless profiles can be time-consuming
- Safety is a HUGE concern
So, what’s an Internet dater to do? How can they get that Vancouver woman to respond to their message? Here are a few tips:
1) BE HONEST. You will have to meet them for coffee or a pasta dinner in the future at some point. Tell the truth early rather than later.
2) DON’T REVEAL TOO MUCH. Whether it is the initial message or even after a dialogue has been established, avoid “emotional dumps” where you pour out everything about yourselves. The Internet can take away some of the interpersonal discovery moments with the ability to type everything out. People like a bit of mystery. Leave a few things for others to figure out.
3) FOR SAFETY, DON’T REVEAL LAST NAME OR PERSONAL INFORMATION. In fact, it is good practice to get a “date email” account for correspondence with potential matches. This will avoid giving away your real name or constant emails to your personal or work account.
4) UPDATE YOUR PHOTO. Most online photos are not current or up-to-date. Present your most current and charming self.
5) TREAT IT LIKE YOU WOULD A JOB. In addition to updating your resume (online photo and profile), be sure to put your best foot forward when an interview comes up (or response). If nothing comes of the encounter, jump right back in there as you would during the job hunting. Just because you weren’t hired for one position doesn’t mean you give up looking.
6) GO OFFLINE ASAP. Avoid spending too much time emailing before talking on the phone or meeting in person. Nothing can replace face-to-face chemistry. Better to find out if you have any before you get too involved. Plus, it helps rein in those outrageous expectations we sometimes have when fantasizing about how great our potential date may be.
7)MAKE EVERY WORD COUNT. Keep your profile description light-hearted, to the point and add a bit of mystery. Short and sweet and wanting more.
8) AVOID ONLY TALKING ABOUT LOOKS IN FIRST MESSAGE. Many online daters feel that comments such as “You’re hot. Wanna chat?” are generic, superficial and unflattering. Many women refuse to respond to such. Instead, take a moment to actually read the profile and respond with a sincere comment that elicits a response beyond “yes” or “no”. (Honestly, if an email or message can be responded by just one of those words — it’s not worth replying to when there are so many more out there.)
Whether it is Internet,speed or matchmaking, dating teaches you a great deal about what’s really important to you in a partner and what you have to offer. By observing yourself, you will gain new insight into how you react to different situations., and which problems you bring into each relationship.