According to an article on Psychology Today.com, love is fostered by how “we act with the object of our affection. We do certain things, and those actions foster the emotions we associate with being in love.” Taking that theory and running with it, we are able to create our feelings of love day after day . . . or date night after date night.
The easiest way to start revealing the connections between you and your partner is through personal self disclosure, or the escalating, gradual back and forth exchange between two people. This comes from trust as a person reveals their vulnerable side. It allows intimacy to deepen and that generates a stronger connection that leads to love, according to the article.
Research Arthur Aron and his developed 36 questions that they used in the lab to create profound feelings of being in love. Broken into parts, each section ups the ante a bit by injecting just a bit more vulnerability. Such as:
- Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
- What does friendship mean to you?
- If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
- What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
Rather than saturate one night with a flood of questions, sociologist Christine Carter broke them up into six date nights, using two questions from each of Aron’s three different sections.
However, please note, that it how you respond to your partner during their answers is vital. Pay attention. Listen to their answers. Reserve judgement. Ask follow up questions. Turn off your phone.